Happy New Year, Seattle! Our collective resolution is to consume more cannabis & participate in more fun activities happening around the city this year. Here are some of our favorite events happening this month:
January 1 (New Year’s Day) - Seattle Polar Bear Plunge 2018 at Matthews Beach Park
Some people like to start their day with a hot shower, but we think the best way to start your new year is with an ice cold bath in Lake Washington! The Polar Bear Plunge is a yearly event where Seattleites dress festively (often in costumes) then rush into Lake Washington at high noon. If for whatever odd reason you’re looking for a “natural high” this year aside from weed, this event's for you.
January 1 (New Year’s Day) - State Park Free Days
Sorry dude, we’re closed on New Year’s Day; Why not unplug from city life for the day and go recharge at one of Washington’s many beautiful state parks? Entry to Washington state parks is free on January 1st (no Discover Pass required), so get outside and get some fresh air! Speaking of fresh air, you can’t legally smoke pot in a state park if you’re in public view, but you can totally toke up, "within the confines of your own tent or RV,” according to Toni Droscher, a spokeswoman for the state parks commission. She also added that you can’t smoke, “in a state-park-owned yurt or cabin or platform tent,” so make good choices out there!
January 2-14 - The Book of Mormon at The Paramount
"Have you heard the good news?" The Book of Mormon is returning for another run at The Paramount! Winner of multiple Tony awards including Best Musical (2011), this Broadway show by the creators of South Park is acclaimed for its balance of comedy, choreography, and casual blasphemy. There’s no telling when the show will be back in Seattle, so take the opportunity to go see it before The Book of Mormon moves on to the next city!
January 4 - Weed School: Legal Beverages @ Herbn Elements
Class is in session! Come and meet the folks from Mirth Provisions (best known for their line of Legal sodas) and learn how they produce their popular infused sodas. Try Rainier Cherry (hybrid), Pomegranate (sativa), Lemon-Ginger (indica), or Cranberry (1:1 CBD). All Legal brand infused sodas will be 20% OFF ALL DAY!
January 5 - Stoned Evergreen Travelers at Slim’s Last Chance
Referring to their genre as “metal grass,” the Stoned Evergreen Travelers are a local band from Tacoma who combine folk, punk, and hellbilly rock to create their unique sound. Picture Flogging Molly wearing metal shirts. If nothing else, show up for the merch because their logo is pretty sweet.
January 5 & 6 - Punk Rock Karaoke at The Funhouse
One of the most challenging things about being a karaoke enthusiast is knowing your audience and exercising restraint; though you may be liquored up and ready to deliver your best rendition of “Holiday in Cambodia," the attendees are probably expecting show tunes, bummer-ass breakup songs, or that one Eminem song everyone knows all the words to. But January 5th and 6th are your opportunities to be a rockstar for a night! Punk Rock Karaoke, hosted at The Funhouse (the bar adjacent to El Corazon), gives attendees the opportunity to sing karaoke versions of punk tracks while backed by a live band. It gets better; the band is comprised of professional punkers who play with the likes of Bad Religion, Adolescents, and Goldfinger.
January 10 - Science of 'Breaking Bad:’ A Look Behind the Hollywood Screen at University of Washington
By now most everyone has binge watched Breaking Bad on Netflix, taking bong rips and pondering if the chemistry is accurate (if you haven’t yet, please do that now. I’ll wait). In this free lecture at UW, the show’s science advisor Donna J. Nelson— who was also the 2016 president of the American Chemical Society— will discuss her contributions to the show and presumably answer questions too. Find out once and for all if there really is a sophisticated chemical refinement process that results in blue methamphetamine. Participants need to register in advance, so reserve your spot ASAP.
January 11 - Weed School: Puffin Farm at Herbn Elements
Class is in session! Meet the gang from Puffin Farm (a staff and customer favorite) and learn how they produce some of the best flower, cartridges, and raw CO2 extract in the Northwest. All Puffin Farm products will be 20% OFF ALL DAY!
January 13 - The Suffering Fuckheads at Watershed Tavern
If you love jazz and/or socially justified excuses to use uncouth language in a public setting, then don’t miss The Suffering Fuckheads! This organ jazz duo will be playing tracks from their album entitled Obnoxious Jazz for Sensitive Assholes. If you have a good time, be sure to say, “thanks, Fuckheads!"
January 13 - School of Rock: Metallica at Chop Suey
If you didn’t get to catch Metallica play back in August (possibly because you went to see Slayer instead), the next best thing is to check out School of Rock: Metallica. Cheer on the next generation of rock stars as these kids take the stage and belt out Metallica covers. Shout, headbang, throw the horns, and help make these kids’ days as they make ours. This seems like a cute event that budtender Laszlo could take the kids to!
January 14 - International Bubble Flashmob at [Secret Location]
Wanna get high and blow bubbles at strangers? Dope. Me too. The International Bubble Flashmob is happening somewhere in Seattle… we’re not sure where yet, but if you sign up they'll let you know the location 3 hours in advance. It’s BYOB (bring your own bubbles), but if you donate $5 they’ll give you 2 tried-and-true bubble wands plus a full 24 hours notice of the location. Because it’s a flashmob, participants are expected to act casual and conceal their bubbles until precisely 1pm. It sounds like it would be worth participating in just to see unsuspecting peoples’ reactions.
January 15 (Martin Luther King Jr Day) - National Parks Free Entrance Day
In honor of MLK Day, all National Parks— and all state parks, for that matter—will be fee-free (or “free,” as a marketing professional would say). This is your chance to explore Olympic National Park or Mt Hood National Park (Oregon) without paying Uncle Sam a dime! However, you do not want to get caught with marijuana in a national park as they are federal lands; the feds have a lot more resources than the states, and they will follow through and make your life more difficult than it needs to be for mere possession. As a reminder: you have the right to refuse a search, it’s a bad idea to store cannabis in your glove compartment, and rangers will only sweat you about weed if they can smell it or see it.
January 17 - Why We Stayed Here at Theatre Off Jackson
It's cold, wet, crowded, and increasingly more expensive to live in Seattle... so why haven’t we all packed up and moved somewhere spacious and affordable by now? Performers and community members share their perspectives in a KUOW production aptly titled “Why We Stayed Here."
January 18 - Weed School: Green Revolution at Herbn Elements
Class is in session! Are you ready for the revolution? The crew from Green Revolution (formerly known as Ethos) will be in the shop to talk about their spray tinctures, including their high CBN sleep spray, and their gluten-free 1:1 Green Baker cookies. Their products will be 20% OFF ALL DAY.
January 18 - Roommate Court at Laughs Comedy Club
We all know somebody who’s going through some sort of petty dispute with their roommate. If the passive aggressive notes about dishwashing aren’t cutting it anymore, it’s probably time for them to escalate the situation… but there’s no reason arbitration shouldn’t be fun, right? Roommate Court is an improv comedy show judged by an actual real estate agent (and comedian), with a real life attorney (and comedian) as the public defender; the cases are real, and the audience will serve as the jury. Submit your cases in advance.
January 20 - Free Trapeze Show at Emerald City Trapeze Arts
What’s better than a trapeze show? A free trapeze show, of course! The students of Emerald City Trapeze Arts are swinging into the new year by putting on a free show for all ages. To answer your next two questions: 1) yes, there's a safety net in case anything goes wrong, and 2) yes, stoner, concessions will be available.
January 25 - Weed School: [Mystery Vendor] at Herbn Elements
At this point in the blog we’d like to address the rumor that Herbn Elements doesn’t have a vendor lined up for January 25th. This rumor is false, unsubstantiated, and frankly hurtful. We absolutely have a vendor in place for the January 25th installment of Weed School, but we just don’t want to spoil the surprise yet.
On an unrelated note, if any of our vendors are reading this, let us know if you have any reps available for January 25, 2018.
January 31 - The Rise and Fall and Rise of Marijuana in America at University Lutheran Church
When we came across this event at a church entitled “The Rise and Fall of Marijuana,” we figured it might be some sort of anti-weed rally, but upon further reading, we learned that historian Emily Dufton is speaking about her new book entitled Grass Roots: The Rise and Fall and Rise of Marijuana. Her work chronicles the story of our beloved plant’s struggle towards acceptance, from decriminalization, to the war on drugs, to the medical marijuana movement, to now. Dufton will talk about how cannabis activists are currently succeeding, and how marijuana’s history suggests that another counter-revolution could soon unfold. Hooray.
That’s all for January! We hope you have a happy and safe new year,
Article by Ramsey Doudar; an in-house marketing and social media strategist at Herbn Elements. Ramsey's perspective is influenced by 1.5 years of budtending, 5 years as a cannabis industry marketing professional, and 10+ years of being a super picky medical patient.